I stole a line from, I know you know, one of my favorite songs
Say something I’m giving up on you
I pour out my heart, tell you my fears, trust in your therapeutic skills
And you say, bullshit.
You even agree – it looks like someone tries to say goodbye, move on
Well honey, is that what you are trying to tell me?
As you can see, it is not working
Either you need to be clearer or I need to take your word
So why do I still care? Because…
Because… I know you. The first time we met I thought, I know you.
And maybe this is all make-believe and I don’t want to be wrong
For which – to be fair – the evidence is quite strong
And maybe dreams and wishes get confused with reality
And I don’t know you at all
Maybe I only know a silhouette, a shadow of what you want me to see
But then again, who says that this is not real?
I know a person who is determined, strong and smart
Gosh, you are a genius with languages, you challenge instead of to comply and you never stop asking why.
I know a person who is blessed with good-looking genes and a humor that makes me laugh so hard
A person who cares who gets frustrated with people, with their views, their ignorance and intolerance
And yet, you give them, yourself and me a second chance.
I know a person who can be harsh – mostly to itself
With labels like “fail”, “anyway”, “doesn’t matter” – but you do matter
A person who finds it easier to listen than to be listened to
A person who inspires and is hard to keep up with
A person who is friendly to everyone, but selective whom to call a friend
I know that person.
I know you.
I know you know how much you mean to me – because I have told you
I know you know that I love you – of course I do
But don’t worry, strictly platonic. At least 90%.
The labels boyfriend/girlfriend don’t fit
And I’m glad
Because it means we never have to break up.
Bullshit, I hear you thinking
Well, I don’t give a damn
You say you want to be a good listener, then listen –
You are my friend
I will take your one-word replies, your “anyways”, your silence
I will listen to your dreams, doubts and pain, and the unspoken stories between the lines
I will follow you to any place, sit with you and wait patiently
Until you see yourself the way I see you.
(May 2015, Auckland)